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I'm in year two of serious weightloss BUT I've put some weight back on. I need to lose it - AGAIN - deep sigh.


I've had a complicated relationship with food since childhood and have always been bigger than most of my friends.

I spent my 30s getting increasingly and worryingly bigger - hitting a whisker under 17 stone (238 pounds) in 2004 (I think but I was too embarrassed to get on the scales). I got married in 2002 and was a fat bride (something that still upsets me). I also wanted to get pregnant.

In 2005, I did my own hardcore diet (gym six times a week, protein shakes etc) and lost 3 stone (42 pounds). I was diagnosed with Mastocytosis, a rare condition (faulty genes!) that is made worse by...exercise!

By then, I had already committed to raising money for breast cancer so I trained for a walking Marathon (Moonwalk) and kept the weight at bay. But it started creeping on again once the exercise stopped.

Fast forward to New Year 2007.

I was fat and 40 so decided that radical action was needed, if I was to stand any chance of getting pregnant. I was in fertility's last chance saloon (endometriosis doesn't help).

I chose a VLCD (very low calorie diet) as time was against me. I chose LighterLife because it addressed the issues of food addiction, offered group sessions (2 hours per week for 14 weeks) and tools for change - CBT (cognitive behaviour therapy), as an example.

I started at 14 stone 8lbs (204 pounds) and finished at 9 stone 10 (136 pounds) in autumn 2007.

In 2008, I got pregnant for the first time, miscarried, got a new job, left the new job, was diagnosed with depression and gained 3 stone (42 pounds) in the process.

I've started 2009 determined to learn the lessons from my hideous year and have chosen to go back into abstinence (not eating conventional food) until I reach a weight that I feel is sustainable with the appropriate effort (exercise, healthy diet and avoiding my trigger foods).

Hmmmm. That's the challenge; in the meantime, real life continues.


My friends and immediate family, movies, blogging, the allotment and gardening, husband and gorgeous dog (not in any order!)