Something incredible happened last night. I turned down the opportunity to eat!
Some friends had come from London to experience a night out in our little town, the lodger joined us and then, in the pub, we happened to meet some more people we knew and suddenly there was a group of us in a corner and it felt fantastic.
The lodger and I had been to the gym to get our Power Plate training session before we met up with everyone. Our friends from London, quite rightly, were hungry (I had offered to make food in advance) and my husband wanted to eat too but the lodger and I weren't really that bothered. This is alien behaviour and I asked my friends if they thought I was being rude if I didn't join them but remained in the pub. They were fine about it (and I am really grateful they were understanding). It just felt right to ask (apart from the social anxiety, obviously) but going for a curry was ALL wrong. I just didn't want to eat it. My husband said was it was because I was having too much fun...
The old me would have gone along regardless, ordered whether I was hungry or not and then eaten food I wasn't particularly bothered about
So I was assertive and it was just what I needed and I do feel proud of myself for saying what I needed. It's new behaviour, it's scary and my crooked thinking has been in overdrive today to ensure that I don't get ahead of myself. I've managed to convince myself that it was really rude and wrong but I did keep checking with my friends.
In spite of all this anxiety, it was very liberating to say no (to food)!
PS when we eventually got home at 1.30pm, I did have toast and cakes from The Hummingbird Cafe!
That bakery looks amazing - mmmmm. Just as well it's not an area of London I go to alot!
love
Peridot x
Posted by: Peridot | December 17, 2007 at 12:57 PM